31.7.06

What about it?

Yeah, I know. I said I'd have pictures of Ren. Faire. I know. I know I said I'd have pictures of knitting. Yeah, yeah, yeah...I know, I know, I know. I say a lot of things, actually. It's really all I ever do. I like to say things. I like saying things all day long. When I am not talking, I'm usually saying things in my head and, guess what, it often takes time away from doing other stuff, my saying of things.

I think I am a mean person. I think that others think of me as a mean person. I think that when I do anything, no matter what its purpose is, I do it with a certain meanness. I bought some yarn that was on sale for $4 a skein at a yarn store in downtown D.G. I couldn't think of anything to make so I decided to make a cabley scarf...and that's what I'm working on now. Anyway, the point is that while I knit I notice that I am all tensed up...the whole time...and I also realized that I consider knitting to be one of (if not the only) thing that is "relaxing" for me. Isn't that kind of sick? Isn't it sick that my "relaxation" is physically painful, yet it I still call it relaxation simply because I think that I enjoy it enough to not get bored with it? I think I just put so much meanness into everything I do, even things that should be fun. It sort of eff's up your perception of life...that it is meanness and tension headaches.

So, that's how I feel right now...and, no, I don't have pictures...my battery is dead in my camera and I don't have the patience to spend 10 seconds plugging it in. How many Jessica's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? It'll never happen...because they would all just make mean faces at the filament.

End post.

1 comment:

Kara said...

so my grandma gave me a bunch of random crochet today's from the 80s!!! How fun is that?!?! There's a ton of patterns for random stuff!! I miss you all...who can i rant to shit about??