HAPPY...happy...HAPPY...happy...HAP--

Ok, how happy am I?? Well, first of all:





I love the new cardigan I'm working on!! The lace looked like it was going to be hard, but it is totally simple...but still interesting. I love the color (it's very Sandra).

I'm also happy because my OTHER new yarn just arrived like, five minutes ago!! That was FAST!! The yarn is lovely...so soft...love the merino. Too bad it's going to turn into socks for The Russian, because I'm totally in love with it. I will DEFINITELY be ordering some in a different colorway for myself someday soon! If you are interested, I bought it here. Seriously, I love it. I really want to learn to spin. I've tried in the past with a drop spindle, but I wasn't very motivated at the time I suppose. Someday...someday...It WAS sort of one of my New Year's resolutions, after all...


One thing that I found interesting online today. That's right. There apparently is a knitting oriented store in Scottsdale, AZ that bears my name. One of these days, we'll have to have a leetle vacation, mmmyes. I'll make The Russian jump on board...is Scottsdale anywhere near the Grand Canyon??

A hole in my gusset....................NOT!

Yes, this is progress. I know it looks a lot like it did yesterday, but yesterday's images were sans gusset. Today's images have gussets...


...and a sock knitting first. My gussets look good...without holes. Cheers to that!

Note to self: Give this post a proper title

So, I've been knitting...I've been working...thinking...pissing...moaning...

But the knitting, well, the knitting is going just perfectly, actually.


This sock is really coming along nicely. I hope I make a complete pair, because they would be quite handsome.

I wonder what sock I will make next...


Max likes these and so do I. I just need to find the right yarn. I'm thinking of buying some online from this spinner. Her stuff seems really nice and I've heard good things out and about in the blogosphere. Plus, I like the idea of doing my part to support the indie artist/craftsman society which I hope to someday be a part of.

The mistake rib is slowly yet surely growing. I hope to finish it by the end of this week...and then have a proper photoshoot. I think I'm going to try to make my own lightbox, of sorts. Max, the wily Russian might enjoy fiddling around with something like that. But that's neither here nor there.

P.S.--right now I am completely enamored with Habu Textiles. They have kits that are semi-astronomical in price, but...get...this. They have STAINLESS STEEL yarn...that's right. It is mohair, I believe, wrapped around a stainless steel core! That's effin' amazing...you can crumple it all up, if you want, and it will maintain that shape. HOW WICKED AWESOME. I need...NEED...to play with it!!!! The kits I love are, this, this, and this. Keep dreamin' Jess...keep dreamin'.

Another post entitled "Sometimes"

Sometimes, I just look at myself and shake my head...what am I going to do with myself? What am I going to do?

That's all for today.

A blog post

I woke up this morning feeling a little bit irritated and not so excited. I really hate it when a day starts this way, for no apparent reason. I need to call up David's Bridal today and I'm not looking forward to it. I really want to go, yes. Sandra needs to try on the bridesmaid dress and I need to pick up my gown.

That's right...my gown has already arrived. "You need to really hurry and pick out a dress...it can take MONTHS to arrive." "Oh no, what am I going to do?? I don't know which one I want....shit...shit...SHIT...ok THIS ONE!" Yeah...I could have taken more time. But whatever, I am sure I made the right decision anyway. I love it. I am not excited about having it in the guest room closet for the months to come. Seriously, how am I going to keep myself from putting it on...every...day? :) I wish I could put some photos of it up...but Max reads this blog and he's not allowed to see.

So, yeah. Even though I should be excited and happy today because I'll most likely be picking up my dress, I am not excited and happy at all. It probably doesn't help that fat cat George cries outside the door all morning every morning...or that when I walk out of our bedroom I am faced with the permanent piss stains on the floor from the same annoying cat...or the fact that I've been told my house smells and the air is unhealthy. I've already vacuumed once this week but I'll probably end up doing it again today. Part of me wishes that my mom would take fat cat George back with her when we return Scooter. She's mentioned it before, but I know that deep down she doesn't really want to. He, however, never destroyed HER carpet...only mine...asshole.

Anyway.

The weather was completely wonderful for the weekend. I wore shorts and a tank top...we walked everywhere...it felt nice. I even have some rosy shoulders to show for it. Today, of course, is completely overcast. I haven't gone outside yet, but it seems like it is colder.

Ok...knitting. I haven't done much...I don't really have any of what I would call "real projects." Socks aren't "real projects" even though they are time consuming. I can really only do one repeat at a time on this thing (about 10 rounds) because by the end of that, the pain in my shoulders and neck becomes nearly unbearable. Socks are fun....but I don't know what it is about them that causes the neck pain. Maybe it's just that they are so small. No pictures of the sock today because I am still working the leg. I'll show you again once I work the heel flap. Wait for it.

I've been mistake ribbing for the rest of the knitting time. It's coming along quite nicely. I really love the silk yarn and mistake rib...I sort of want to keep this thing for myself, but I need to see if I can sell it. If I do, I can buy more yarn to make one for myself...and maybe some for another for sale item. I'm most likely wishfully thinking...I tend to do that.

Right now, I am sitting on the couch just trying to think of what I'm going to do with the rest of my day. A shower is in order...a potty break for Scooter...probably some mistake rib...but then what?? I really wish that my yarn would arrive. I have no idea where it is or if it has even been shipped at all yet. The website doesn't have any way for me to track it. I don't remember seeing a tracking number in the email they sent me either. I don't like that. I am one of those people who eagerly awaits the arrival of a package...constantly checking my order status online to see where it might be in the country. Has anyone ever ordered yarn from The Knitting Garden?? If so, do you remember how long it took for an order to arrive?? It's only Monday and of course I am not expecting the package today or even tomorrow...maybe not even this week...but I do hope they are speedy and reliable...I really do.

I don't want to blog anymore. That's it for today.

On quitting

I am quitting. QUITTING. Two of my projects are just plain finished as far as I'm concerned...never to be touched again...I hate them both.

One is the cabled cardigan. I just never want to pick it up again. The other is that stupid dress. What a waste of gorgeous fabric. I wonder if I can salvage any and make a skirt. Probably not, though.


I'm so upset over the dress too. I worked on that damn zipper again today and I don't know what my problem is...I must not be good at sewing, which is a shame because I spent a huge chunk of my life dreaming of being some sort of fashion designer (wait, I still dream about that from time to time). Maybe all hope is not lost...but it sure as hell feels like it. What kind of designer can't sew a zipper?? Seriously. It looks like utter shit:


See? Who's gonna wear something like that?? Not me, that's for sure. This dress was supposed to be easy. Whatever...it wasn't. Let's not even talk about THIS drawstring casing:


Yeah, it looks nice, but I won't even begin to tell you how hard it was or how many times I had to tear it apart and start over. To hell with it. I just want to move on to the next sewing project...which is another dress...with another zipper. Sheesh...there really is no escape from it, is there? Maybe it doesn't require a zipper...maybe it's a button up the back number. Maybe?? ((she runs and takes a look at the pattern specs)) No, it's definitely a zipper.

Whatever.

Here's a sock:


Here's my next project:


That's my little brother, Scooter...I'm babysitting while my mom is in Florida. As for the pattern, it is from the beautiful Romantic Knits. Oh, you actually want to be able to see the pattern, do you? Here, you can (sort of) see it in more definition in this shot:


The required Rowan 4-ply cotton has been ordered online and will hopefully arrive soon...the sooner, the better with the way things are going in my craft life. Ugh.

Oh, and look at this. Isn't it pretty?? That's just some mistake rib in silk yarn...to be on sale on Etsy.com hopefully within a few weeks.

Perhaps a bit migraine-inducing

I do love socks...I do love my newest beginning of a sock...but damn do they ever give me some neck pain. I had to stop knitting today as a result of that pain.

So, while I've not been knitting today, I have been thinking. I am bored. I don't like being bored. I should not allow myself to be bored...with knitting. I need a new sweater or something to work on and I have made it my goal today to lay the plans for my next big project.

I'm having trouble deciding...I'm going through all of my books and magazines to find the right thing. At this point, I don't care if it is for me or for Max...I just want to knit something bigger. I still have not finished that cabled cardigan and I probably won't...It's too tedious...and way too small. I know that I have HUNDREDS projects that are just sort of waiting in line...but it's hard to pull one out of that list and GET GOING on it. Plus, there's that whole issue of buying yarn. God bless knitpicks, I will probably be making great use of her this time around.

Tomorrow's post (if there is one) will have photos and hopefully I will have made a clear decision on what is next in my knitting escapades. Until then, Happy knitting.

Suspicions confirmed

Yes, that sock...while ultimately adorable and attractive in appearance...would not stretch over my foot without a fight. Once on, I felt my feet begin to throb as they struggled to pump blood through themselves. "Can't you just do that blocking thing?" "No, honey...I don't think so."

I spent the rest of the night moping and ended up going to bed.

I'm trying those cute socks again, though. In a different yarn...in a different color. I know that I could knit them on size 2 needles instead of size 1, but I like the finer gauge...so, thicker yarn it is.

No pictures of my immense failure or the shaky beginnings of the next one. :[ At least it does seem to be considerably larger...and that's what I needed. :]

Self-righteous

Something that bothers me is self-righteousness. There is nothing wrong with being righteous within one's self...but to go through any kind of effort to impress others with that righteousness is disgusting. Of course, we are all guilty of it from time to time...but some of us are definitely more into this sort of behavior than others. Enough said.

Well, maybe not enough has been said. I know I can be a huge snob, but my favorite person definitely isn't myself...because I'm around me all the time and know the horrible things I am capable of thinking. But when I am around (maybe not in terms of proximity but figuratively or otherwise connected through alternate means of communication) people who I feel are getting braggy and self-righteous, I tend to want to put them in their place...by being a tad bit self-righteous myself. The thing is, I sometimes feel that people think I'm a bit naive...that I'm not as intelligent as they are...that because I am a bit more reserved and have a less in-your-face personality (those who really get to know me see quite a different Jessica) I must not be thinking as much about the world around me as they are. I must not be living in the real world, or some nonsense like that. Maybe it's because I seem to spend a lot of time knitting...and wasting my time...when they have "other" things to do or are "too busy" for things like that.

Guess what. I know what's up. Shall I knit you a picture of my world view? Would you understand it? Probably not... (talk about self righteous!!)

Wow, that was wordy. Something did encourage me to write this, but that will remain a secret to any readers I may have...unless I know you personally and trust you enough to explain when you ask.

On to "more important" things (and, yes, in a sense I do mean that)...like knitting...


I am very close to being finished with sock number one of a pair of "Child's First Socks." I really love the pattern and I have had it memorized for a while. It's nice when you don't have to look at the pattern in a book anymore. It saves you some time and also a bit of weight in your purse (because, of course, you take your knitting with you everywhere). I am getting so close to that toe that I am starting to get "excited," if you know what I mean. Ew...if you're thinking that, then you definitely don't know what I mean. :)

Here's my progress so far:


Lookin' good. I do have one problem. I cast-on way to tightly and I can hardly pull the thing over my heel. I don't know what to do about this. It seems that it will fit everywhere else. Sock number two will be cast on much more loosely. The book has a few tips on how to cast on. I should have read them before starting sock one, but I sort of jumped the gun. I didn't realize until well into the sock that said tips were there. Oh well. I think I'm going to unravel the cast on row (is that possible?? I've never done it before) and bind it off much more loosely than I cast on. We'll see.

Why is it that every time I knit a sock, I run into some sort of problem...something that I say "Oh well" to and quickly follow up with an "I'll do it right on the next one?" I really should be striving to do things right THE FIRST TIME!! Argh.

That halter top is slowly, yet surely, growing:


I don't have much to say about this one. It's easy. Hopefully it will have a good fit...but it will probably end up baggy and saggy. I don't really care on this one. I just wanted something ridiculously simple and thought free. It's what I knit when I don't really feel like knitting...at night, when I'm tired, 10 minute breaks at work...you know.

I've started another project too, but I'm not showing pictures today. It is something that I hope to sell for some sort of profit. I figure I spend so much time knitting, I should benefit from it in some financial way.

I think that's all she wrote today. I can think of nothing more to say.
Ha...that rhymed...good show.

Death, no wait...taxes.

I'm not one of those people who get all bent out of shape over the fact that they have to pay taxes. I am, however, one who gets completely stressed out when it comes to anything financial. This is mainly because I don't really understand how a lot of it works yet. To be honest, I don't really want to. Money buys things...that's all it is really good for in the end.

I AM one of those people who find the process of DOING taxes ultimately annoying/boring/confusing. I've filed my federal taxes, but not state...because I WAS BETWEEN STATES! They won't let me file for Illinois online because I'm a first time filer in Illinois...and Turbotax won't allow me to MOVE ON to file my Missouri taxes online until I do something about effin' Illinois! Those bitches! (said with the utmost respect and humility, of course). I can't make a phone call from home unless I go outside (no reception, I live in a dungeon) and we've got some fabulous spring weather goin' on around here (that's sarcasm again) so I don't want to freeze my ass off for the IRS. Sorry, guys, you'll just have to wait until I get out of the house this evening for me to do what I need to do in order to file.

Yeah, yeah, yeah...I know...don't even say it. It's kind of the 12th of April. It's kind of close to the deadline. Sure, sure. I'll git 'er done...promise.

Ehem, so...

Knitting: I have turned the heel on my teeny sock and have gotten halfway through the gussets. I tried to pull the sock on...and it's hard to get over my heel because the cuff was probably cast-on too tightly. Ooops. I never said I knew what I was doing. I think that it will fit fine on my actual leg, however...just getting it over the heels might be rough. I'm sure that as long as I don't tear it apart in my attempts to wear them, it will be fine, right? Right?


Socks...I love to wear them...but do I love knitting them?




Yeah...I think I do.

Now onto things a bit more seamless:




That's the start of a mind-numbingly simple halter top in the latest Vogue Knitting. The yarn is Lion Brand Cotton-Ease in Taupe. Oh, my goodness gracious. I love this yarn. I love this color (how typically neutrally-earth-tone of me). I'm not sure how flattering the halter itself is going to be, but I love how simply it is knitting itself up...almost without me...and that's ok.

Oh yeah, one more thing. MMMMMM BRUSSEL SPROUTS...

Sometimes

Sometimes, you feel you must buy half of the yarn for something ridiculous...and the other half as soon as you can afford it. That's how I'm feeling about the yarn for a particular skirt in a particular magazine. There is this really adorable-in-the-most-bizarro-way skirt in the latest knit.1. It has ruffles...lots of ruffles...silly, silly, ADORABLE ruffles. Actually, the pattern is written so that you attach (sew) the skirt to a polo shirt to create a dress...but I would much rather wear it as a skirt. I don't think it would be too hard to add some elastic to it...and that's what I intend to do...when I get the yarn.

Sometimes, you WANT to go in circles. I know in life it can be frustrating to seem like you are always ending up where you started...but sometimes, it's just the sort of thing you need. I think it might actually be harder to deal with those seams you always seem to be left with. Why do you think the phrase "seamless" carries such a positive connotation? That's why I've decided my next project will not have seams...it will fit together without them and I won't have to figure out which stitch to what stitch. That would be nice...and another reason why that silly ruffly skirt I mentioned is becoming more and more enticing.

Sometimes, you try to knit socks again:


It's coming along...I'm wondering if it might be too small for my foot. I am not sure yet if the stitch pattern really allows for much stretching and I think it has finally become clear to me that I knit more tightly than I should...maybe it's the pain in my shoulders or all of the anger I tend to carry...I'm working on it. :)

So, I just looked at that pattern for the skirt and realized it is not worked in the round. What a shame. But don't worry, my pets, I've found something else...something to make me yearn for warmer weather...and maybe even a tan.

Would you like to see a picture of me dying an Easter Egg with a really stupid face and kind of a creepy-looking hand?


Put some lip-balm on, self, seriously.

Well, that's all for today. Over and out.

Eventually Easter

Tomorrow morning will be Easter morning and I always like to think about what that means to me. Easter is a reminder of how to live your life, full of only gratitude for what you have and also the willingness to give it all away...seemingly for nothing. Kindness and love...that's what God is to me...and that's worth celebrating.

I'm not going to go into a whole theological schpeal or anything. I just feel like stating that, yes, I am a Christian...and more importantly, I feel most "Christians" are missing the point...an ultimate sacrifice seemingly for nothing...

Enough of that...but I hope you have just a glimpse of what my spiritual beliefs are in that respect. This world is temporary. I have said that so many times in debates on ALL topics (political, religious, spiritual or otherwise)...because that's what it all boils down to. What have we to hold onto?? It is only those intangible things...those natural experiences that matter, and--dare I say it??--all you need is love...and that is all that politicians and most of the human inhabitants of this tiny planet are lacking.

I don't even know why I'm going into all of this heavy nonsense...


WHEN I HAVE A FINISHED OBJECT!!!!


It's the Wrap Jacket from this book.

I think I sort of like it...sort of. Of course I have my nit-picky tendencies. It's a bit wide for me...but not so much that it's really noticeable. All in all, good times.

Oh, and here's my sock so far:


It's not QUITE pink...but it is close. I love this yarn. It is Regia Bamboo color sock yarn...and it is SO FULL of color, but still very subtle and not too flashy. It feels nice to knit with too.

That's all for now. Happy Easter!!

All knit up

The wrap jacket is all knit up and is currently blocking (rather half-ass-edly, I might add) in the guest bedroom. I don't feel like taking a picture. I am hoping that it will finish doin' what it does by tomorrow morning so that I can go ahead and tackle the seaming. It will probably take me a while to seam...we'll see. I am not sure what to use to seam it. I don't have enough of the yarn I knit it in to seam with...but I wouldn't have used it if I had enough because it is a tape yarn. I have a feeling seaming with tape yarn isn't the best idea...and would probably be very annoying. I have some tannish, neutrally sock yarn that I probably won't ever make a real "PAIR" of socks out of and I am thinking that I will use that. I don't know...I'll decide tomorrow. I also need to decide what yarn to use for the trim...another thing that might take forever to get done.

I am knitting a sock...and I really like it. I already had to take the whole thing off of the needles and start over, but since then, all is well in Sockland. Even though it's late, I think I may knit a few more rounds tonight...although, knitting while tired may lead to a THIRD start on the sock. I'm a risk-taker, what can I say?

Ok, I lied

I still do not have an FO. I'm not sure why. The second sleeve is almost done. I only really need a few more hours to work on it. The thing is, I don't really LIKE working on it...I don't really LIKE EITHER sweater I'm trying to finish up.

I started to feel an urge to try sock knitting again...because they are in the round in one peice (no seaming)...and I have a cool book of sock patterns...and I bought some sock yarn AGES ago that I need to use up for something, what better than a sock? Leave me alone.

I went to Borders a few days ago to listen to the Yarn Harlot speak. I had a great time. She was hilarious and the place was packed full of knitters. I didn't knit there...I didn't feel like it.

I know I said I wouldn't post until I had an FO because this blog is boring to read unless I'm making some sort of progress or posting images. However, I failed to realize that in many ways I maintain sanity by blogging...even if it seems that I don't have much to say. I've been feeling pretty depressed lately and nothing I do (or anyone else does/says) seems to make me feel better. I even beat myself up WHILE I'M KNITTING, which I never used to do before. I'm supposed to be knitting for fun...not feeling bad about doing it because I should be doing something else. In all honesty, why should I feel guilty about doing something that helps me clear my mind and makes me feel better? At least it isn't something detrimental to my health. On the contrary, it keeps my mind sharp, my hands busy, and my imagination and creativity are allowed to do what they do...NATURALLY. I shouldn't feel bad about knitting, but lately I do...and I hate it.

I also hate that I'm not a writer...but I don't want to go into what that means (let's just say it sucks to feel that you're a failure in something you've been doing since you went to Sunday School).

So, I needed to blog today...enough said. This blog may end up being more about me than about knitting, but I don't really care right now. I don't really care if I ever have another FO because that's not what this is about...at all. It's a hobby, not a career and I need to stop dreaming. In general, not just with knitting, I need to stop dreaming. Especially when it isn't even clear to ME what it is that I truly want.